Experts Find That Faster Online Dating Meetups Reduce Anxiety

A new trend in dating apps, dubbed “carouselling,” is increasing anxiety for users who fail to get over the initial hurdles of an online match. Studies, including those by relationship expert and Wingman CEO Tina Wilson and ones conducted by Finding The One, have revealed that extended messaging before an in-person meetup leads to heightened stress, with 77% of singles reporting increased nervousness the longer conversations last without a face-to-face encounter. This leads to neverending loops – “carousels” – of messaging with no attempt to set up a meeting.

Dating expert Sylvia Linzalone explains that carouselling traps users in a cycle of endless messaging, making them more anxious about meeting in person. “The longer they stay on the messaging carousel, the more daunting the idea of a real-life date becomes,” she says, adding that it intensifies feelings of hesitation and uncertainty.

The survey of 1,500 singles shows that while 83% of respondents prefer to meet within a week of matching, many feel pressured to continue messaging, fearing that suggesting a meetup too soon might come off as too forward. This hesitation often results in unrealistic expectations and anxiety before an actual date. As Tina Wilson put it, “the unknowns become too much, and it’s over before it even started”.

This could be a major roadblock for a lot of dating sites that rely heavily on that first interaction going smoothly, especially if these studies are indicative of modern dating trends at large. However, it also signals good news for any platform that is already pushing for users to meet up in person, or at least get over major hurdles like video calls sooner – once a user escapes the carousel, they often escape it for good.