25% of Americans Are Attracted to “Protective” Dating Partners

A new survey suggests that physical protectiveness remains an attractive quality for many Americans, although relationship experts caution that long-term compatibility depends on emotional qualities rather than physical dominance.

The research, commissioned by PokerTube and based on a survey of 2,000 U.S. adults conducted in July 2026, found that 26.6% of respondents said they found someone more attractive if they believed that person could “win a fight.” By comparison, 11.6% said the trait made a potential partner less attractive.

The findings point to the continued appeal of the so-called “protector” archetype, even as dating trends increasingly emphasise emotional intelligence, communication and compatibility.

The survey also identified regional differences in attitudes. California ranked highest, with 40.3% of respondents saying a partner’s ability to win a fight made them more attractive. North Carolina (34.4%) and Arizona (33.3%) followed, while Tennessee recorded the highest proportion of respondents who viewed the trait negatively, with nearly one in five saying it made a potential partner less attractive.

Gender differences were relatively modest. Around 28.6% of men said they found the characteristic more attractive, compared with 24.9% of women. The results challenge a common assumption that physical protectiveness is primarily a preference among women, suggesting the trait appeals across genders.

However, psychologists say the motivations behind that attraction are important. Dr. Max Doshay, a clinical psychologist quoted alongside the survey findings, said that the appeal of physical capability may be less about conflict itself and more about what it represents.

According to Doshay, people may associate someone who appears capable of protecting themselves or others with broader qualities such as confidence, resilience and emotional stability. At the same time, he noted that attraction to physical dominance can become problematic if it is linked to control, superiority or unequal power within a relationship.

hile traditional ideas of masculinity and protection continue to feature in relationship conversations, many studies have also found that qualities such as communication, trust and emotional maturity remain among the strongest predictors of long-term relationship satisfaction. Doshay echoed that distinction, arguing that successful relationships are ultimately built on mutual respect, empathy and open communication rather than physical strength alone.