Keepler CEO – Creating a Community for Dating Support & Guidance
Keepler is a community platform where users can find support, guidance, and new skills when it comes to forming better relationships. Global Dating Insights spoke with Rachel Abramowitz, Keepler’s CEO & Founder, to find out why the platform can be a valuable companion to dating apps.
In a recent episode of The GDI Podcast, Rachel Abramowitz spoke with Senior Reporter Sean Nolan about challenges facing singles & couples today when it comes to finding a partner & building a strong relationship with them.
She also shared how the platform is developing tools to help users organise and maintain their dating lives. Visit Keepler’s website here.
Listen to the podcast here or read the full discussion below:
Sean Nolan
Hi Rachel, thank you so much for joining me on the GDI podcast. To start things off, can you introduce yourself, tell us about Keepler, and share what makes it unique?
Rachel Abramowitz
Absolutely. So first of all, thank you so much for having me. I’m so pleased to be able to speak to you. So my name is Rachel Abramowitz, and I am the Founder and CEO of Keepler. I founded Keepler in business school after having a career in academia and having dated myself for many, many, many, many years online, and realising that it was a miserable experience.
It was very difficult to meet someone real, someone who had the same intentions, and who knew how to communicate in a way that created a healthy relationship. So after doing a lot of research both in school and then taking the project out of school, we decided to create Keepler.
It is a two pronged business. On one side, there is a community. So this is a place where peers can discuss their issues, they can get support, they can get advice, they can vent about something, they can ask for practical advice and philosophical advice, if you will. And then on the other side, there is a marketplace. So this is a place for experts, dating coaches, relationship coaches, matchmakers, really anyone who has an expertise in this vertical, to advertise their services. And I say advertise, what I really mean is they can post articles, tips, any kind of video that showcases their approach.
So we have an expert feed wherein people can post these ideas, and the community will view these, tips and articles and can say, “This expert, their approach really resonates with me, I’d love to book them”. So we are really bringing down the barrier to entry when it comes to hiring a dating coach or relationship coach or matchmaker because there is still some stigma around doing that. Therapy had this problem 15 years ago. And now, it’s strange if you don’t go to therapy, right? I’m joking, but many people are now in therapy.
But this extra step, I think, is really missing from people’s lives. So we’re normalising it, we are allowing people to really vet experts before they reach out and allow the experts to showcase their approach and get more clients. So we’re not a dating app. This is a major misconception. We’re not matching people yet. I say yet, actually, because this may be something in the future as we start to learn about our audience.
But we really wanted to tackle the practical and emotional issues that people have when they are dating online. So we are not in competition with dating apps. Certainly not going up against the behemoths out there. There’s no way. And so we’re really a complement to these dating apps. You can be dating online, you can be dating in real life. And we are a place for you to learn communication skills, learn self regulation skills, practical things like: How do you reject someone? How do you ask for a second date? How do you do these things, because we’re not taught how to do them.
We might see models, maybe our parents, our friends, movies, whatever it is. But a lot of the ways that we’ve been taught are either not healthy or effective. So this is really a way to hone your skills and find the person you’re looking for and have a touchstone to come back to, to make sure that you are on the right path for you. So long story short, we are both a community and a marketplace, ready to support you as you go out and date.
Sean Nolan
And I think it’s really interesting to hear about this two-sided approach you have where you have that support from people who’ve been through the dating journey, who’ve experienced dating apps and are ready to help you and listen to you. And then you also have the more professional aspect and you can reach out to people who are experts in this particular field.
What really stands out, as you mentioned, is that Keeper is like a companion to online dating, right? Helping users to build their skills so that when they do go and date, wherever that may be, they’re doing so more prepared, would you say that’s sort of accurate description?
Rachel Abramowitz
Absolutely. So more prepared practically, but also knowing that you’re not alone, because it is such a strangely isolating experience to go out and sort of paradoxically have this huge pool of people from which to choose, but people experience decision paralysis, ego crushing moments, a lot of the dopamine hits and the addiction that you get from swiping.
So Keepler is really a place to come back to be grounded to set goals, to track your experience, to support others. So you could be a 28 year old guy in Florida, and you could get support from a 65 year old woman in Seattle, right? I mean, people who have been through these things, who you might not be able to speak to, in your normal circles, but someone has some wisdom for you, that will help you along your journey.
So we really want to bring those kinds of people together, and help people realise that they’re not alone. This is something where the stakes are very high for people. And yet, dating apps have created this very strange disconnect between those stakes and the way that you go about finding your person. So navigating that disconnect can be damaging to one’s mental health and so we’re really a place where people can come to find equilibrium.
Sean Nolan
You make a very good point there that, you know, dating is very personal, and therefore it can be very isolating to go through something and have people around you who don’t really understand. So I think this is kind of like a community hub for people to find that sense of belonging.
One aspect of Keepler is that it serves people wherever they are on the relationship journey. First of all, I’m gonna start by talking about singles in particular. So what do you believe are some of the key challenges that singles face today when it comes to dating online or dating, generally? And how has that affected what Keepler is doing and the kind of support that you’re providing?
Rachel Abramowitz
I think for single people, it is so difficult today to wade through the options. I mean, the first thing is this decision paralysis that I was talking about before that you are given nearly infinite options, right, and swiping through how do you start to compare? How do you start to keep track of your decisions that you’re trying to make? And there’s a very practical part of that, which is truly how do you stay organised.
And I’ve seen on the internet and Tik Tok, people are actually creating spreadsheets to organise their dates. And this is really filling a need for some kind of distilled, vivid visual of all the decisions that you need to make and all the options you have. So that’s one way that people are solving this. And we are working on actually a feature that will do something similar and become a holistic part of the app. So that’s one thing, people can’t make decisions, because there’s always another swipe. There’s always someone around the corner.
The other thing is that as these apps have grown, so has the fraud that comes along with them, the catfishing the really bad fraud, whereby people steal money, and there’s a lot of safety issues. And of course, that’s not only an online problem, real life has those problems also. And so any online system or programme that claims that they’re 100% safe, I don’t think that that is a reasonable claim, because life is not 100% safe, right? But I think teaching people to watch out for those sorts of conversations, those sorts of scams, bringing people back to themselves, when they are swept up in something that seems like love bombing, or seems like they’re being led down an unsafe path, I think we can help them with that.
And also, people’s communication skills have really atrophied during the pandemic, and it’s continued till today. A lot of the interpersonal skills that people need to build are not being built throughout life. And then of course, the pandemic really exacerbated those issues. So,we’re all on our phones, we are communicating in a very different way. We’re not really interacting on the street anymore, or even with your person to make your coffee or whatever it is. And so, these skills really need to be taught and practised. You need feedback for them. So that’s a big challenge, too, because you could be a wonderful person, your date could be a wonderful person, but if you can’t communicate, you’re not going to know that each other is wonderful, right?
A solution I have seen out there is the AI solution whereby your computer is essentially talking to someone else’s computer. And you know, great, okay, wonderful, your computers are having a terrific conversation. But then you get to the date, and you don’t have that crutch anymore. And you’re like “oh, I don’t know how to talk to you”. So it’s kind of a band aid. And it’s a temporary solution to a really long term problem. So we really want to empower people to feel like they can have a real conversation, that they know how to ask questions. They know how to judge someone’s body language or their facial expressions or their tone. There’s a lot that goes on in interpersonal relationships that I think needs a refresher, if not a 101 course. So I think that’s really where people tend to stumble, and so we’re there for them.
Sean Nolan
I think you made so many interesting points there. And I think one thing I’d like to pick out was, you mentioned that people can look out for love bombing, right? I think it’s so interesting, because even the phrase love bombing, for people like you and I who are in the dating industry, we are familiar with this term, we know what it means and we know what to look out for. But for people who aren’t familiar with that term, aren’t familiar with this type of behaviour when dating, it’s so important to look out for these different signs or red flags. To make sure that they are looking after themselves and making sure their dating journey is as positive as possible.
I want to now focus on people in relationships, because that’s another demographic that you’re looking to serve. Can you tell us about the kind of support and resources that Keepler can provide for people to strengthen existing relationships? How can people in relationships build these skills and develop even further?
Rachel Abramowitz
As anyone who has dated and then gotten into a relationship knows, dating is really, really hard. But then of course, being in a relationship is almost harder, because all of your stuff comes up, right? You cannot escape yourself, right? The templates that you built psychologically over time, your subconscious, your patterns of communication, your patterns of behaviour, and you’re coming up against someone else’s, and you may be wonderfully compatible, and it’s exactly the right person for you. But that doesn’t mean that your personalities are not going to clash in some way.
So it’s actually even more vital I feel, to address relationships as well. So of course, people who are dating have this urgency, and we want to address that. It’s real, and it’s true. And then people in relationships, they may not feel the same surface urgency, but if you care about your relationship, and you want it to last, you do still need to build those skills, and we are all building them, you’re never perfect at them, right? Like the game is over only when you die, right? You are constantly learning and changing. And your partner is constantly learning and changing. So there’s no point at which you’re like “okay, great check done, I get an A plus, and I’m perfect”.
So this is really also a place to continue to build those skills to make sure that you are heading any issues off at the pass. There’s a lot of prophylactic skill building that you can do to prevent difficulties down the road. And if you find yourself in a conflict, or, you know, you do need some advice, this is a place you can come to talk to your peers, some of whom have been through relationships and are now dating again. It actually doesn’t really matter if the person who’s giving you advice is currently at the same stage, right? People learn all different lessons at all different times of life. So there could be a really wonderful nugget of wisdom that someone you would never expect to have, actually gives to you. So that’s a really wonderful part of the community. And then, of course, the expert side, relationship coaches, and they often have psychology backgrounds. So we are not promising therapy, this is not therapy. But a lot of our coaches are grounded in very therapeutic practices and psychological practices. So they have dealt with couples before, they’ve dealt with individuals in couples before, and they can help guide a couple through any kind of season in their relationship. So we do really serve both of those populations.
Sean Nolan
I think you mentioned a really key point, which is that people will be on Keepler and developing lifelong skills of social interaction and emotional intelligence, and then one day, they get a partner that they really like, and then suddenly it’s like “oh, sorry, I’m stopping becoming a better person now”. It doesn’t make sense.
Rachel Abramowitz
It’s like the real work begins now.
Sean Nolan
Exactly, so it totally makes sense that people can continue this lifelong journey that they’re on regardless of their relationship status. I now want to take a step back and ask a little bit about Keepler as a platform and as a business. So where is Keepler currently available? And how would you describe its current stage of development?
Rachel Abramowitz
So we are on the Apple App Store, we decided to go with Apple first, for various reasons, there are always trade offs, we do want to have an Android version in the future. That is very much in our sights. And we are building some really interesting features now that do bring together the whole experience.
So we want to connect the community, we want to connect the experts, to tools that you have for yourself as user, so a date diary tracker, where you’re doing reflections, you’re organising your dating life in this way, and you’re interacting with community and the experts within this space just for you. We also are working on what we’re calling DARR right now – Dating App Rapid Response. So this is a way for people to get immediate help for 15 minute increments. So they say, send out a call, saying ” I really need help with this message” or “I don’t want to see this person again, I really need to help with a script to let them down” or “I’m just really nervous right now I’m going on a date. And I need some expert support right at this moment”. So that is a way for us to connect experts and users, sort of quickly and more in the moment.
And then you can actually now book experts. So that is another feature we are bringing to life. So you can say, “I’ve been following this expert for a while. I love what they’ve been posting, let me just reach out and see when they’re available”. And the expert actually sets their own services, their own prices, their own schedule. So an expert can say “I’m available for a 30 minute dating profile audit” or a six week or six month or however long coaching session. And they’ll be in control of their own services and pricing. They can also sell books, they can sell downloads. So it’s really a place for dating coaches, relationship coaches, and matchmakers to sell their services, get a broader audience of people who are there to find those services, right? This is a very targeted audience for these experts. So you can see how this flywheel starts to be created throughout each of these features. And this really becomes a central hub for all of your dating needs. As you’re out there, you can come back to this home and feel like you have things under control.
Sean Nolan
It sounds like there’s so many kinds of interesting ideas and developments and opportunities available with Keepler and so much room to keep growing, keep serving people, and figuring out what exactly people need help them with in dating. And I think you’ve already got some great ideas. So as we just started 2024, do you have any plans or targets for the year ahead?
Rachel Abramowitz
Yes, the release of these features, which we’re so excited about, and really getting this feedback, making sure that we are building what people want. We do our research. Obviously, like any startup, you do your research, you make your best guess, you hypothesise then you test and you see how it does in the market, and then you iterate. So that is really the plan going forward.
From a business perspective, we’re going to go out for money, I think that that’s going to be a very exciting offering in the venture world. And because this is an opportunity, really to use the current infrastructure that these dating apps have built to support our app. So we actually, in a funny way, we win when people win, right? So people will stay with us if they’re doing well, because they want to continue to do well. And we win when people feel like they’re not doing as well on dating apps, because we are a place for people to come when they need some more support. So it’s an attractive offering. Unlike other dating apps who win when users lose. They only win when you come back and you don’t find someone so there’s a difference there. And then of course Android, we’ve had a lot of people say, “this sounds great, but I have an Android. Let me at it!”. So we really want to serve those people. And continuing to come up with new features. If somebody says, “I love this, but I’d also love this…”, listen, we are open, we are not in this to make ourselves happy. We’re in this to make our users happy. So that is constantly listening, constantly scouring the world to see how people are already solving their problems. And if we can help them solve those problems more efficiently, we will do that.
Sean Nolan
Yeah, definitely really excited to follow Keepler and see how you continue to develop and take all this user feedback on board. I think it’s gonna be a really exciting journey. So finally, I just want to give you the opportunity to tell our listeners how they can keep up with you, and all the developments to come.
Rachel Abramowitz
So you can sign up for our newsletter on our website. So if you go there, there’ll be a pop up to sign up for the newsletter written by me. I really do write it, I don’t rely on ChatGPT. It’s truly, truly from me. And I have a great time writing it. So that’s a lot of fun. And you can download the app on the App Store, you can check out our website, which is keepler.com. And also if you join that mailing list, we will send out updates when features are released, when there are some major changes or even surveys. You can talk about your dating life, give us some insight into what you want and need. And we truly do listen like, again, this is for our users and we want to make you very, very happy. So those are the ways you can participate.
Sean Nolan
Perfect. Thank you so much for your time today. It’s been great talking to you.
Rachel Abramowitz
Likewise, thank you so so much.
